Hey, hey everyone! It's been a while since I had a blog. Almost one year exactly. My two other adventures in writing crashed and burned just like every single one of my romantic relationships. I guess it's kind of my thing - the crashing and burning. But when you crash and burn it clears out all the old energy and makes way for the new.
I'll just say now that I'm unclear what exactly this blog is for. I suppose a lot of what I want to write would be regarded in the vein of salf-halp (see below). But it's honestly more to help me than you. It's quite selfish really, but I have no qualms admitting that because I'm an only child.
Salf-halp (noun) - Stems from term 'Self-help' which is the act of helping ones self (which is ironic because you still read shit loads of books other people wrote to help you, which is still seeking help outside of yourself). The term salf-halp was coined because it sounds more like a white woman is saying it since we are the ones who made it the multi-million dollar industry that it is today. But anyone who uses or refers to 'salf-halp' male or female, is basically a person of privilege trying to find their meaning instead of embracing the fact you have to create it. See also - the preface to any of Gwyneth Paltrow's cookbooks.
Diving right in...
I did a major thing recently. I left my hometown of Colorado Springs and moved to the bustling playground of NYC for no other reason than I had the opportunity to a room and because I'm brave af. I mean, the city had been calling to me for a few years since I first visited. And I'd love to pretend I'm one of those people who isn't serendipitous and always checking for signs but deep down I am. I just can't help but feel the road I'm on leaves hints guiding me towards which way to turn next. But my logical, Sam Harris reading brain fights it. Conceivably, it's because I'm looking for the signs and therefore creating them. I mean, there's also a major chance that aliens are controlling our entire environment and we're no different from the lab rats humans use in a simulation for #science. Not sure which part of my brain believes that...
But we can't deny that certain things just feel "right" - aliens or not. And for me moving to NYC felt right. I mean, besides the bouts of crippling doubt and impending doom that I would fail, it felt pretty okay. Truth is, none of us have any fucking clue what's going to happen no matter how much we save or plan. And suffering will always find you no matter how strategically you try to hide from it. So I took another approach and decided to chase it. Even if I just extended myself in a completely "wrong" direction, it will all come out in the wash eventually. Sure, I'm probably going to be a little poor for a while, but that's a great opportunity for weight loss and to cut back on drinking. Right and wrong are arbitrary really. They are only based upon the circumstances and mindset you're given in any moment.
It's true, we are creatures of habit and comfort so we like to pretend that by not inviting change, change won't happen. But beyond our fears exists the highly intellectual (some more than others) and easily adaptable parts of our minds and bodies we possess as humans. The fear of change can be crippling, I know. But instead of focusing your thoughts there you should remember whatever change you're facing will not feel uncomfortable forever and more than likely not even for very long. We should always focus on what we are likely capable of VS. what we fear we won't be able to do.
The human brain has the capacity to bend and twist much like our bodies when we accept that as possible and then invite ourselves to play around with that theory. I mean, we landed on the moon for fucks sake. If we spent a little more time uplifting not only ourselves, but one another. Shit. I bet we could land on Neptune.
So think about it. If we all meet the same fate in the end - death - what do we really have to lose? Who really wins? Is it the rat who hit the lever until he overdosed on cocaine or the rat who got electrocuted his whole life? No one isn't suffering. I would never argue that there are some suffering vastly more than others, but if your circumstances set you up to take some chances don't do a disservice to your role in this life. Who knows, maybe your role can even help others.
If we have arguably no control in life, and if Earth is the maze, and we all just want some cheese, fuck it. It's a beautiful maze and cheese is good - even some vegan cheese is pretty comparable now. We're all just in the Universe and when we die we'll still be in this Universe. We are the universe, man! There is no escape, so you may as well learn to roll with the punches while you get to.
I've been wanting to write and run my own blog for a long time. I've done it under other people and under pseudonyms. This time it's all me. No holds barred. No shame. So thanks for stopping by and feel free to stay a while.
The Slam Hancock